THE CAMP:
Unabashed True Metallers, The Battle, The War, And The Suggested Stance
Preface:
Be aware, readers. The first few paragraphs are a bit personal. The feuding within the world of Metal is very much a problem to me. It has been for years. And as one of the longer-standing members of the family, these things are not just a minor issue within part of what I entertain myself with. This isn't me liking a movie franchise that has a scandal going on about it that makes it unpopular. It's not me making a big deal about something I saw on a sitcom. Metal is so much more than that to those of us that are, and have been, active in the "scene" for a number of decades. I'm confident that I can speak for the bulk of metalheads from late-20s to, well...old age, actually. Thankfully I know a few extraordinary younger fans that I consider good members of the family. But that's not as common as I'd like. This grand form of musical expression and culture is approaching half a century of existence, with ingredients getting stirred years before that. And it's still here, growing, changing, thriving, and...suffering. It's not just a force that's plowing down the opposition. It's meeting a lot of it, actually. It's strong, it's aggressive, it's real. But it's not been enjoying the untouchable status it once had. So, get through the first few paragraphs about my long journey and my personal stance today. Or you can skip them, because the subjects in those bodies of text might not seem so relevant to those that don't know me, personally. Or, if you understand, they might hit home. I'm honestly a bit unsure about that. But for sure, I urge you - metalheads young and old, new and veteran - to read on. This day and age might be seeing a bright horizon, that is...if we allow ourselves to see it and help it. But if not, my friends and possible detractors, it is doomed to being an unenjoyable corner of the world of The Arts until it's dead, altogether.
Be aware, readers. The first few paragraphs are a bit personal. The feuding within the world of Metal is very much a problem to me. It has been for years. And as one of the longer-standing members of the family, these things are not just a minor issue within part of what I entertain myself with. This isn't me liking a movie franchise that has a scandal going on about it that makes it unpopular. It's not me making a big deal about something I saw on a sitcom. Metal is so much more than that to those of us that are, and have been, active in the "scene" for a number of decades. I'm confident that I can speak for the bulk of metalheads from late-20s to, well...old age, actually. Thankfully I know a few extraordinary younger fans that I consider good members of the family. But that's not as common as I'd like. This grand form of musical expression and culture is approaching half a century of existence, with ingredients getting stirred years before that. And it's still here, growing, changing, thriving, and...suffering. It's not just a force that's plowing down the opposition. It's meeting a lot of it, actually. It's strong, it's aggressive, it's real. But it's not been enjoying the untouchable status it once had. So, get through the first few paragraphs about my long journey and my personal stance today. Or you can skip them, because the subjects in those bodies of text might not seem so relevant to those that don't know me, personally. Or, if you understand, they might hit home. I'm honestly a bit unsure about that. But for sure, I urge you - metalheads young and old, new and veteran - to read on. This day and age might be seeing a bright horizon, that is...if we allow ourselves to see it and help it. But if not, my friends and possible detractors, it is doomed to being an unenjoyable corner of the world of The Arts until it's dead, altogether.
Enthusiasm. It's a fire we effortlessly start with the magic we naturally have in our youth, which gets dangerously close to untameable at the threshold of our adulthood, and all but dies out at a certain point, usually a few years before a midlife crisis. You know, the calm before the storm.
And so I'm writing this with a dying flame. It's exhaustion, heartbreak, and - ultimately - pain that has done this. But, no...I'm not letting that flame die, all in all. I'm keeping it low. It's essential to let it dwindle now, since a huge, wild, unavoidable fire attracts those that wish to extinguish it entirely, bringing out the heavy-duty fire hoses and teams to just eliminate it altogether. It's believed that the growth of grand and belligerent passions are dangerous, which is due to an ignorant disbelief that the owner of such a phenomenon can keep their flame at bay and within set, reasonable parameters. But even the strongest and most ardent of warriors can die. So, I just want to back off my shine a bit in order to stay personally warm...and existing. Mine is a living and nourishing campfire. It's just more personal and much smaller than it once was. But a campfire it is, and sit around it peacefully with me, you'll hear many a wondrous tale.
What I'm saying here is, just like the grey and educated stance of neutrality I fall within now, my battle is over. Whether a war ensues or not is reluctantly being forced to the background of awareness. As I type, I imagine my favorite camping spot back home in The Ozarks, where I've gone many times to BE ME, simply and with mere essentials being the only concern, not to hinder but to empower myself to sit and bask in existence. A weapon might lay by my side for precautionary reasons, but it's not drawn and pointed at any foe.
There's only a handful of individuals that might even know of what exactly I'm talking about here - the foes I've faced, been ambushed by, created against myself, or kept an active campaign fighting against for years. Those people already understand all these words, yet comprehending this END I'm referencing of said battle is what might appear a bit confusing, even surprising to most of them. And having said that, I'll say this: Tastes, beliefs, and values do not change within one as vigilant and altogether real as I make a conscious effort to be. But, the tactics (or lack thereof, in this case) and actions for those things, and against the opposition of those things, well...those DO change. At this point it's about honor. It's about respectively backing away just enough to get less shrapnel and kickback due to how horrid of a person I can become when constantly and profusely aggravated with those irritants, which is really for the innocent ones around me, those that reach out to me, or even who merely observe. Also, for a small percentage of myself that I do allow to be selfish, is about keeping what's left of my sanity, which - being that it's quite rattled and tattered at this time in my life - is so I can enjoy those tastes, practice those beliefs, and maintain those values I speak of here. On my own. No interruptions.
I'm about to get much more specific. But I must say, shedding some weight from my shoulders entails a lot. Much of it might seem trivial, meaningless, or even petty to a lot of people. But I retort by saying that if it truly is a heavy load on MY back (an individual that I'd like to think deserves a bit of respect), whomever would write my burdens off like that merely don't understand where, how, or why those things can be heavy on certain types of people. I'm not the only one that has ever fretted over the details of the battles being referenced here. I'd give an example, but will choose the cop-out of saying that if you need one for this, by this writer, then you really shouldn't read on...as it will just seem like an overly melodramatic headcase going on about things that are nothing TO YOU.
Now is where my seemingly cryptic references get a bit clearer.
See, the metal scene - my passion, my fanaticism, and an area of the hobbyist and entertainment industry that I actively create within - has been lost for the greater part of this new century, that is, in MY observation. Well, it's been out of control at least to the general consensus, that is. Now, don't get me wrong, the mainstream representation of what true fans of heavy metal and it's offshoots (genres and their subgenres) has never been 100% well-represented to the masses BY the masses in its verily representative form. Never. Trends come and go, and the highest $$$ in such trend is what the "casuals" get handed, and thus making them believe beyond the shadow of a doubt that it IS what it really is. (These same people have something in their lives they know is misrepresented, and that they fight to clear the haze about - be it politics, religion, comics, movie adaptations of books, and so on...Yet they attack us for merely caring about something.) Since something, or someone, bigger than them handed it to them, then it MUST be true...right?! But "casuals" are just that; casual consumers that just want to enjoy some music. And that's fine. But, it's when uneducated newbies desire to go further, defenses already up, stepping through doors with unknowns lying behind them, that things get messy. Behind the doors to any world lies those that provide within that world. And those people will take it a lot more seriously than the "casual" observer.
It's one thing to say, "Hey, I'm new to this, and I know a few examples of what I enjoy. I'd like you to show me more and help me get deeper into this", but another to step in, guns blazing, with verbal diarrhea like, "So I love Avenged Sevenfold, Disturbed, and Five Finger Death Punch, and I AM metal! I'm TRULY metal! And I don't have to meet your elitist standards just because I like some popular shit! So I'm gonna come in here and take from the buffet! I'm gonna just go ahead and say I matter just as much to all of this! And you can't stop me!" See the difference? And this happens not just in public, but designated, private places that already give these people a chance by letting them in in the first place. (Examples would include private Facebook groups, metal concerts, and even in-person conversations with groups of already established friends that someone might want to request getting in on...which is already dangerously assumptive behavior.) And it's not just those two good and bad attitudes that change things for nearly everyone. It's the responses, too. And please understand, depending on my mood, as well as the types of interactions I've dealt with during the course of whatever day, I've been guilty of both sides of being a "good guy" or a "bad guy" in my responses. I'm human, and I have nerves.
As metalheads - which is often like being a collector, a club-member, a hired professional (if the person is a musician, journalist, sound man, etc.), and at times even a surviving P.O.W...sometimes all of these at once - we are frustrated. And the fact that we're frustrated frustrates us even more. We didn't grow our hair and get tatted up, spend tons of money on our extensive collections, pay hospital bills from numerous injuries, avoid the law to have harmless gatherings, have many a family crisis over our supposed "evils" (the last few there explaining my P.O.W. reference), leave the high-strung, corporate society behind...just to be in another social society that ISN'T laid back. We signed up to be cool, at least to the ones in support of us, or who would respectively like to look into becoming one of us. And yes, I can say with an abundance of experience that being a metalhead used to mean "that person's gonna be cool as fuck", which seems like a faded Utopian memory of a long dead world to us now. And that's sad. But we ARE frustrated. And it's seemingly always going to appear that we're just this snobby, cocky, unapproachable sect of degenerates now because of the assumptiveness that the corporate media breeds in the less obsessed music listener. What's mainly going on is "casuals" are attempting to speak for whole communities, which will always be a bad idea in any circumstance.
Let me paint a picture now. What would happen if an admittedly good, talented, protege' of a young BMX bike champ went into a well-established BIKER bar with a bunch of Harley choppers sitting out front, just to walk in, kick his feet up on the table, and say "Alright everybody on two wheels! Let's talk bikes!"? Well...ahem... I'm not gonna answer that for you. You know what would happen. Especially if the kid accidentally, or carelessly knocked over a drink. And that is what it is like.
Yes. Yes, It is.
Just because music might be like a secondary television show without visuals, a background enhancer, an added luxury for a car ride to work to a good lot of people, doesn't mean that some people don't LIVE not only to create music - METAL, in this case - one of the most involved and complex CULTURES within entertainment that there is. We are going to be fanatical about it. And so I've already mentioned assumptiveness a couple of times. And I'm beginning to believe that this is the root of the offense. For instance; that BMX kid would do just fine in that biker bar if he calmly and respectively just went in, sat down, ordered a beer, and listened. Just to chill, LEARN a little about what the place was like, what the bikers were like, before he did anything else - mouth shut, eyes on phone or book...something in his OWN bubble, or whatever. Most bikers aren't dickheads looking to beat up young boys for no reason. Afterall, it'd probably not be his bag after a while. He'd most likely wanna go back to the bright, energetic, sportsy and youthful world of his motorless-wheeled scene and get the hell outta that dimlit and smokey place full of scars, whiskey-worn voices, and grit. He'd have not stirred things up that way, at least. BUT - had he acted the way I initially portrayed in the analogy...whoo!...Just...let's just not be assumptive in anything! It's dangerous in life in general. Carelessness toward anything with passionate people behind it is basically just asking for it. Even so, I've never physically harmed anyone for insisting on having a metal talk and then only having things to say about a bunch of radio grunge and mallcore. Hurting these people would make ME wrong. I'm frustrated enough to do so, yes. But putting the assumptions in their place, verbally, is not a mistake. It is actually a good lesson to give.
But a good chunk of my culture have sadly become bad people, at least nowadays. I admit this. They pounce on innocent and even well-intended tourists with the verbal poison of The Westboro Baptist Cult. And I also find myself resembling them at times, sadly. But it's very much due to the incorrect portrayals that society - in this instance, the media, mainly - hand out to the "casuals", fueling their ranting diatribes of empty words and cries of "bullying". And this makes scenario after scenario of THE SAME BULLSHIT EVERY DAMN DAY. Now, do I mean this "casuals" thing in a derogatory way? Not necessarily. It depends on how the kid walks into the bar.And, in turn, even the most harmless chuckle and "I don't think you quite understand" kind of stance toward an ignorant individual is met with the same cry of "INJUSTICE!" that a complete elitist prick threatening to break a kid's nose is met with. And that is not good for kindhearted metal representatives who would welcome teaching curious inquirers about the very things we love to talk about anyway. The much maligned and still hazily defined "SJWs" are looking to scream "INJUSTICE" at anything inside a scene they've weaseled their way into and don't understand to begin with. For them, it's all about changing pre-established things and patting themselves on the back, whether it was a noble cause or not. What's next? Entering the horror movie world and incessantly bitching that it's too horrific? (These pests are really a whole 'nother article, altogether. One I'm not willing to dwell on at this time. It gets me too riled, making my writing just seem like an angry text to a rival co-worker.) And we will stand our ground, meeting aggression with equal to superior aggression, when arrogantly approached. But, alas...we are weary. At least we 30-somethings that get our enjoyment interrupted every day. I know I am. I'm 35 now, and some days I talk myself out of opening my computer, just so I'm not faced with the same problems that face me every time I hit any social network and type more than a few sentences in virtual-public. Those are also the days I turn on the TV, hook it up to Youtube, and be sure that I listen to or watch metal with at least one member of the band going grey...y'know, so I can ensure it's not gonna remind me of these pesky "LET'S TALK METAL, AND DON'T BE AN ELITIST ASSHOLE JUST BECAUSE I LIKE EMMURE, YOU STUFFY OLD ELITIST, ELITIST, ELITIST, ELITIST, BLABLABLA"-types of twerps. Elitist-this, elitist-that.
We know what we are talking about. So what?! Knowing about something when someone else doesn't is now...bad?! Maybe try NOT pissing us off, and try to befriend us without trying to appear that you have already got it all down, and equip yourself with a bit of conversational skill to keep this childlike drama out of our formerly gritty and tough scene. Having said all of that, the thing is - going out to actively look for a fight with those that just casually listen (thus enjoying bands that maybe someone actively IN the scene, or PROFESSION, knows offputting things about) just makes us look like bullies. But when we're approached by a "casual" (gaming communities, and any established community with work and sweat behind it, hate this) in a "What's y'all elitist old-schoolers fucking problem, yo?!"-type of tone...it's really OUR DUTY to allow the triggering of annoyance to overtake us, because that trigger incites DEFENSE, and when it's in a verbal setting, this defense is to passionately EXPLAIN. Now, if the kids don't want to hear why, and are just looking for a fight, this doesn't do much. But at least it makes the alternate viewpoint known. And in a world of social media where everything said is observed by many; that's why I say it's our duty, both as people that know and respect the history of the less-than-casual art of music (a sacred form of art for centuries, despite the form it takes), but as humans who need to spread the message of standing up for ourselves when wronged. And we've been wronged, and attacked for it. Again - we should not go out seeking opponents in whatever war is sadly going on, but when it comes to us...fighting about it is noble. It gets the message, one that is not negative, of why we hold music - METAL specifically - so dear, and worth fighting FOR, not ABOUT. Their "about" is different than our "abouts". We are not as casual. It's not a background noise to us. It's not merely our car ride companion. It's not just equal to having something that's stuck in our head be something to sing in the shower.They hear a deathcore band playing slammy breakdowns, we know that the band couldn't care less for Suffocation or the rest of the NYDM scene, and this makes us roll our eyes...and worse, rightfully bothers us if the bands doing such PUT DOWN those coming before them. They hear a catchy melodic dual harmony in a metalcore song, thus simply liking it, we have heard the band in question call Iron Maiden "old dad rock", meant derogatorily, and this arrogance chaps our asses. Obviously, we know as far back as Thin Lizzy influencing Maiden, themselves...but these kids don't just use the bastardized harmony riffs, far removed from their source, but actively talk AGAINST the bands that gave it to them in the first place. Now, keep in mind, as a 35-year-old metal fan that's been at least a rocker for 30 of them, and a full-on metalhead for 25 of them...I have run into this MORE by the new breeds of fans, and worse - fans forming BANDS, than I have NOT run into it. I have precedence for this stance I take. I don't know about you, but without music, my pained life (those that know me understand this reference, those that don't, just know I don't cry over spilled milk) would be unbearable.
But then, in MY world, I'm reminded of the other side of the token - the guys who wear corpsepaint to the grocery store and get mad when they get in awkward situations, the guys who run up to kids in mallcore shirts specifically TO fight with them, the guys who stop listening to a band if their new album has a less-spikey-looking logo than before. I get tired of both sides of the extremist coin. So then, I put on some AOR or 80s pop and lament my broken scene.
Well, to the naked eye, things are broken. I began to speak a bit too dramatically. (But how can one NOT in this schoolyard cluster of cliques? Even magazines and online publications are producing articles back and forth like two former lovers going through a custody battle via Facebook post.)
But it's really not all bad. "My broken scene" is just referring to the surface, the mainstream. So, the popular belief is broken...well, we underground-dwellers can deal with that. Afterall, we've always been screaming "keep the real shit underground!" in a world of hair bands, nu-metal, and metalcore/deathcore mall-dwelling tweeny-boppers. And even that somewhat respectable ideology is flawed in that if one of our favorites gets too many record sales, we are obligated to turn our backs and consult our bag of insults. [Note: I don't do this. A rule of thumb: if a once underground artist, one that struggled and suffered and worked hard, without compromising too much to conformity, reaches legend-status...then they deserve it, thus gaining what I call "rock star status", which is just the decadent big-brother of the underground. Sure, there's stupid people with rockstar status. But bands like Cradle Of Filth, who never un-darkened, who never stopped the offensiveness that once hindered them, don't deserve what the negative types in MY part of the scene misrepresent people like me by actively hating and boycotting. This is obvious pride and stubbornness shining right through. And before them, we had many others - others that are being referred to by an ungrateful new generation as "old dad rock", which - AGAIN - wouldn't be so bad to old people, or rockers, if it wasn't meant as an insult...and if these bands were not metal. But they ARE, and the originals, at that.]
Besides all that, I'm seeing a very healthy "old-schooler" movement happening. I'm seeing some youth actually looking through the spoonfed haze of hypnotized corporate spirit and desiring to be more REAL. And one need only seek to find. In layman's terms, the 80s, metal's heyday, are coming back in popularity. Not only are true fathers of extreme metal being praised, but THEIR fathers are being discovered by the seedlings of today. And the seedlings are using the decades of observation to concoct some truly wicked and genuine metal. Why? Because of the battle I'm showing such an interest in leaving. I am talking about all that "bitching" and "butthurt" we've been screaming that keyboard-warriors are, themselves, BITCHING about. (A cowardly, shallow, elementary cop-out...to see an angry threat, they start calling names and pointing, "Look! Look at this salty old fucker!") At this point, I feel it's been won. I wanted my voice (our voice - the fanatical and honest-to-goodness metalheads) to be heard. But lately, it seems I have been just stumbling around the messy battleground, tripping over shit, swinging a sword around at the empty air. I admit this. Will I still pounce when I'm attacked about my metalhead values? You better fucking believe it! But I'm gonna let the voice we've cultivated, the voice that has birthed its own spirit, do its effective job now. It's here. It's alive now...and we can rest a little. But let us not forget, WARS are never over, and my hand is still always gonna be on the hilt.
As for "war"...There's no winning today...that is...if you're fighting the fight. Not with cries of "safe space" and SJWs, and brats writing songs about how we won't let them in (you know examples if you have the gift of observation), and old-schoolers going a bit overboard in their acceptance of terms like "elitism". And so the war goes on. But my battle is over - at least for now. I've retreated not from the opposition, but into the dark forest, to dwell amongst the metallic things that make MY heart beat...and my small campfire is keeping me warm enough.
6 - 22 - 16
Travis Niemeyer*
*I signed this with my real name for a reason. I want YOU to think about why that might be.